I see today and tomorrow as my toughest days.
3 months ago, at this time, I was just anxious to see Shasta, and to make sure he made it out of the flight ok. If you go back to the earlier postings, you will be able to read about my visit to the Airfreight center and how relieved I was when I first saw him and took him for a short walk within the complex and so forth.
Today, I sit here posting. Usually, Shasta will sit in front of me just below the TV and nap or stare at me. Below the TV lies my 2 pieces of luggage. Shasta is very curious and also suffers somewhat from separation anxiety. When I get off the couch, he gets up too. And even if I'm just going to the kitchen or the bathroom, he follows. We kept each other company daily for 2 months up to the point we left for SF. I don't really know how to describe the feeling... empty? maybe...
I arrived in Singapore last night after a very uneventful flight (Thank God).
I usually sleep quite a bit on flight but sleep was hard to come by this time round.
I watched 3 movies in a row and finally dozed off on the 4th movie.
I flew ANA home instead of United. The food and service was definitely worlds better on ANA than on United. Well, how much worse can it possibly get, right? And unlike cheapo United, most other airlines have personal screens. So, that was nice.
In Narita, I had 2 over hours to kill and so I posted on the blog and had myself something to eat. I also chatted with Jessica for a bit.
On the final leg from Tokyo to Singapore, the flight was extremely light. So, I moved to a empty 3 seat row and took a nap. I only managed a 90 min or so nap.
Upon arrival in Singapore, Jessica was there to pick me up. I think Jessica is trying to very strong so that everyone around her (me, her Mom, her brother) does not feel bad over the incident. I think she is doing a fantastic job. I managed to hold back my tears till I got into the house. Jessica's Mom had left a short note for me (she didn't need to do that, I don't blame her) and when Jessica and I read the note, we broke down.
I don't blame anyone except maybe myself for this entire incident.
I think, due to the lack of sleep on the flight, after I showered, I went to bed. I didn't sleep really well, but everything considered, it was ok.
My parents are out of town on a cruise. They had left yesterday morning (the same morning of the day I was getting in at night). So, we have their car to use.
I took Jessica to the train station. I was gonna buy breakfast home but decided against doing that because that would make me sad... Shasta liked checking out the food we ate. I know he wanted to share our food, and right now, I regret not doing so... but it was bad for him. So, whenever I bring breakfast back, he will come check it out. After a few unsuccessful tries, he will either go lay back down or go eat his own food. These are very small things... but I'm going to miss them.
I think I will go find something to do today. The house seems very empty and lonely. But maybe I have Shasta to thank for getting me out of the house.
Tomorrow is another tough day as we cremate him tomorrow. I will get to see his body for the first time since he passed on.
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